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Maxabout.com > Tips
Smiles and laughter are one form of pretension but there are other modes too. A person may be so sugar-tongued that he may be able to hide his real feelings and may make the other person believe that he is taking a true interest in the other's affairs. The notion, may find favour with some persons that if a man is not angry or does not show his displeasure in an open way, he is showing good manners. There is no denying that a man of true culture and good manners does not fly into a rage every two seconds. But it is also true that pretending pleasure and suppressing one's anger may be easily detected by another, and then this pretension may have in it the evil of falsity and even cheating. In a civilized world nevertheless a person may not express the innermost thoughts all the time and some amount of cover is necessary. As long as this refers to a person's own individuality, there may not be much harm done to the other. But when a person takes action under a pretension, he may motivate something in respect of another. One has to draw the line between good manners and a pretence of good manners while trying to give a different meaning to one's actions.
The most impressive of actions is natural behaviour. If a person has to keep to true etiquette he must behave naturally and normally in the best possible manner without artificiality. It is said that sometimes a "no" is more appreciated than an all-the-time "yes". Some sort of a mild resistance on the part of someone is not only good but also bespeaks his self-respect and restores others' trust in him. A man has to establish himself as well as help others within the ambit of his ability. He has to make his mark in the world and to be socially useful. If he resorts to pretence m any form, he might mess up things. His friends may not consider him dependable. His adversaries may deal bigger thrusts to pull him down. His intentions may not be carried across to others. There are circles, however, where pretensions may be appreciated, where intrigues and duplicities are applauded but those may be limited set-ups and may not fall within the purview of common manners where pretensions aggravate a situation. We may safely ignore them as unworthy of our consideration.
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